Coping While your Family is Away
My 2 older kids are grown, and I miss them.
My husband and I used to come and visit Newfoundland on summer vacations, but almost 3 years ago we made the decision in 2014 to move here from Ontario. Now that I have been living here for about 3 years, I am one of those parents who's children live away.
My son is 23, and my daughter is 21, and they both live away. My son is in BC, and my daughter is in Oakville. My husband and I live here with our 9 year old. I sat my oldest daughter down almost 3 years ago, and spoke to her about our desires to move to Newfoundland. In my heart I knew it was time, it felt right, and mostly I could feel God directing us here. We had said a couple of prayers, asking for signs, and within days the message was clear, it was time to move. We had talked about moving to Newfoundland for some time, but now it felt right.
Sometimes I look back and think, why can't they just be babies any longer? I could have packed us all up and moved my entire family. Life would have been so much easier. But that is not the case, I have 2 young adult children with their own plans, and own lives. They certainly weren't interested in coming with me to a rural town in Newfoundland.
My son was out in BC, so he was happy with whatever we decided. I was concerned how my oldest daughter would feel. But she said, Mom, I know how happy you guys are there, so if that is what you want, then I want that for you too. I asked for her blessing, and she gave it. I was so excited, nervous and scared. I had to keep reminding myself that this was God's plan. I felt a higher purpose orchestrating this move. Once I spoke to all the individuals I needed to, my children, family, and work, it was time to sell the house, well it didn't take long a couple of days, and our house was sold.
It has been almost 3 years since we left Ontario, and I can't say that I don't struggle. For years and years people leave their families here in Newfoundland to go to work. It certainly is a different way of living here. I look back, and think wow having your family together is a blessing, I'd say every other family are separated throughout the year because of work. My heart seriously goes out to them. Each year we hear that the crab plant is not going to do to well this year, my husband works there. So I am always thinking about a plan B, we keep the faith but the reality is, that it just might happen one day where they don't get enough hours.
My husband has said if I don't get my hours, then I will go away for work. I said I didn't move here for us to be separated. We go as a family, so we would head to Ontario for him to find work for the 6 months, or whatever it is he needed. I work remotely, so my job can come wherever I go. I recently returned back from Ontario and as usual I have mixed emotions. Even though this was God's plan, I question if I can do it for the long haul.
In the last year my family has been under alot of stress, I've learned alot about myself in the past year, tolerance and patience definitely come to mind. Having had a very trouble childhood has given me excellent coping skills, but in the last year things that happened within my family has rocked me to the core. I find it extremely difficult knowing I can't fix it. I am physically here in Newfoundland with my husband and younger daughter, but my heart is back on the mainland with my family and friends. My kids still need me, and I still need them.
I continue to pray for peace, and contentment. I knew moving here was going to take some time to adjust, but missing my family and friends is on a whole different level.
Although it was a stressful year, being in Ontario this summer was a god sent. I was able to spend quality time with my older daughter, and my son came to Brampton (where I was staying) to see me, I was so thankful! I also got to see all of my closest friends and family! So despite the stuff that was going on, I felt very happy to see all the people that mean so much to me!
So what's next...I will continue to rely on my friends and faith here. I love my home, my husband and the life we have built together. At this time, I am taking one day at a time...eventually it will work itself out.
What the future holds remains to be seen, but what I am hoping for is to split our time between Newfoundland and Ontario, now just got to convince the hubby ;)
Thanks for listening, and reading....until next time
Much Love,
Shelley xo
My husband and I used to come and visit Newfoundland on summer vacations, but almost 3 years ago we made the decision in 2014 to move here from Ontario. Now that I have been living here for about 3 years, I am one of those parents who's children live away.
My son is 23, and my daughter is 21, and they both live away. My son is in BC, and my daughter is in Oakville. My husband and I live here with our 9 year old. I sat my oldest daughter down almost 3 years ago, and spoke to her about our desires to move to Newfoundland. In my heart I knew it was time, it felt right, and mostly I could feel God directing us here. We had said a couple of prayers, asking for signs, and within days the message was clear, it was time to move. We had talked about moving to Newfoundland for some time, but now it felt right.
Sometimes I look back and think, why can't they just be babies any longer? I could have packed us all up and moved my entire family. Life would have been so much easier. But that is not the case, I have 2 young adult children with their own plans, and own lives. They certainly weren't interested in coming with me to a rural town in Newfoundland.
My son was out in BC, so he was happy with whatever we decided. I was concerned how my oldest daughter would feel. But she said, Mom, I know how happy you guys are there, so if that is what you want, then I want that for you too. I asked for her blessing, and she gave it. I was so excited, nervous and scared. I had to keep reminding myself that this was God's plan. I felt a higher purpose orchestrating this move. Once I spoke to all the individuals I needed to, my children, family, and work, it was time to sell the house, well it didn't take long a couple of days, and our house was sold.
It has been almost 3 years since we left Ontario, and I can't say that I don't struggle. For years and years people leave their families here in Newfoundland to go to work. It certainly is a different way of living here. I look back, and think wow having your family together is a blessing, I'd say every other family are separated throughout the year because of work. My heart seriously goes out to them. Each year we hear that the crab plant is not going to do to well this year, my husband works there. So I am always thinking about a plan B, we keep the faith but the reality is, that it just might happen one day where they don't get enough hours.
My husband has said if I don't get my hours, then I will go away for work. I said I didn't move here for us to be separated. We go as a family, so we would head to Ontario for him to find work for the 6 months, or whatever it is he needed. I work remotely, so my job can come wherever I go. I recently returned back from Ontario and as usual I have mixed emotions. Even though this was God's plan, I question if I can do it for the long haul.
In the last year my family has been under alot of stress, I've learned alot about myself in the past year, tolerance and patience definitely come to mind. Having had a very trouble childhood has given me excellent coping skills, but in the last year things that happened within my family has rocked me to the core. I find it extremely difficult knowing I can't fix it. I am physically here in Newfoundland with my husband and younger daughter, but my heart is back on the mainland with my family and friends. My kids still need me, and I still need them.
I continue to pray for peace, and contentment. I knew moving here was going to take some time to adjust, but missing my family and friends is on a whole different level.
Although it was a stressful year, being in Ontario this summer was a god sent. I was able to spend quality time with my older daughter, and my son came to Brampton (where I was staying) to see me, I was so thankful! I also got to see all of my closest friends and family! So despite the stuff that was going on, I felt very happy to see all the people that mean so much to me!
So what's next...I will continue to rely on my friends and faith here. I love my home, my husband and the life we have built together. At this time, I am taking one day at a time...eventually it will work itself out.
What the future holds remains to be seen, but what I am hoping for is to split our time between Newfoundland and Ontario, now just got to convince the hubby ;)
Thanks for listening, and reading....until next time
Much Love,
Shelley xo
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| My hubby |
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| My BFF's |
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| My son |
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| My daughter |
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| My daughters |
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